AHBMA

It's weird.

It's weird that I like you a lot but I do not want to do anything about it.

It's weird cause all these while in my life whenever I like someone, all I ever did was wanting to be heard and wanting that person to know of the existance of my feelings.

Was it all because of what i've been told before? 

"You come on too strong when you like someone"

"You are too straightforward"

"You can't chill"

Was it because of what he used to say to me that when it comes to you, I just died down?

Or was it because I like you but I don't want you in my life enough to want to do something about this feeling?

Or was I just afraid that if there is a start, it will just end anyway?

Or was I just..... afraid?

I think of you almost every day.. I think..

When there is space for thoughts, I miss you.

When there is space for thoughts, I think of you.

You are there in my mind almost all the time and I have thousands of scenarios I wished happen inside my head.

I'm glad that one conversation I practiced inside my head actually happens a year later... I don't whag this is, i'm turning 26 in a week but I still have yet to propeely grow up.